tests at thespark.com
yes, i know they're dumb
but i took them anyway
first of all, they were quite sure i was a woman
and then i changed a couple answers
ones that i would have had to write long, complicated answers to
had it been that kind of test
and then they were quite sure that i'm a man
it also said i'm-
34% gay, which is below the standard for straight guys. odd, huh? especially since the were *so* sure i was a woman.
9% stressed, which i must argue with, because for some reason, i am somewhat stressed. this was also below average.
23% bastard, again, and as with everything else but purity, below average.
18% bitch, seems i'm a lot nicer than a lot of people.
67% pure, above average. of course.
okay, now that that stuff's out of the way, i'll say that i've come to terms with the bad stuff from maine, and now you can get in on a bit of it. essentially, this girl who came with us got the hots for me and wanted to shove her hands in my pants. and for some odd reason, i decide to be somewhat scientific, and just see what she'll do, all along, me knowing that a) i'd been putting up with a feeling of grossness about it (especially this time she kissed the back of my neck, which would be hot most other times, but really wasn't when i wasn't into it), and b) when that grossness reached a certain point (along with her hand, i suppose), i would put an end to the whole deal, being too grossed-out and anyway too unsleazy a guy to let it keep on (i can put these things on hold a little bit in the interest of curiosity, but wrong is wrong). so anyway, i try to get her hand on my leg, and my mom sees. ugh. fortunately, she didn't make issue of it. and you know, i *knew* i shoulda gone in my sister's car on the way back. i should really have paid attention to the foreshadowing of the whole deal. like when the girl kissed me (minutely, as with on the neck, and thankfully so, i wouldn't have been able to deal with anything bigger) the first night when we got all drunk (we got all drunk most of the nights, but i was far more watchful the other ones), and when my sister said she gets the hots for every guy she sees.
the ironic thing is, i usually yowl and whine that noone wants to do any of that stuff with me. of course, i'd like it to be the right someone, which she definitely wasn't.
but really, that's it. i know you're all probably very disappointed, and thought i'd lost fingers or something.
the good things, i must now mention-
i totally made a mountain my bitch. i climbed up one side of it, careened, hurtled, and sped uncontrolably down the other side, and finally had to ran, walk and pole vault my way back to the dock in time for the ferry off the stinkin island. i will explain the pole vaulting. most of us picked out walking sticks. i picked out a huge branch, with odd twists in it, and used it the entire time to jump a few feet, when walking or running was not to be opted for. midway 'round the base of the mountain on the way back, my sister and i (the only ones to make it all the way up and down the blasted thing) found a nice little beach and got nicely saturated with cool lakewater before picking up and hiking again.
and there was a meteor shower, which rocked. i saw bunches o' shootin stars.
and the rest, i'll say, involved food, cause i don't feel like trying to come up with anymore.
anyway, $100 more in the bank, that is, if my dad has already put it there.
it was originally $200, and supposed to be for maine, but i didn't spend any of it there.
so i wanted to put it all away, but my dad said to keep a hundred, for spending here
which i did, buying lauren a gameboy color (the one that came with pokemon crystal, like mine), and a powerpuff girls game, the one with buttercup, which is her favorite (i like bubbles better). this is all because i missed her birthday, and didn't get her anything for x-mas. and i wanted to stop her from whining about that, and had a hundred dollars. she paid for the other stuff that night, though. then we came back here, and had a huge pokemon playing festival of playing pokemon. then a little powerpuff girls, and she had to go home, cause she had work the next day. al is going to hate me. or at least think we're having an affair or something.
she's trying to either kick him out, or move out herself. she complains that he doesn't know how to do things, and then won't teach him to do them so she won't have to go nuts anymore. "it's not my responsibility to teach him this crap" or whatever she keeps saying. swallow it, damn you. just teach him. i don't really care if he doesn't need another mother figure, you're being one already, paying for the apartment, at least lessen your own frustration with him by solving the problems that are as easy to solve as teaching him how to iron his clothes. for christ's sake!
of course, lauren is too hard-headed to listen, even if i were to say that to her. she'd know i was right, but brush it off as stuff she didn't wanna do anyway, just because. and then she asks me if i think they actually have a chance, and of course, i don't form opinions on that sort of thing, nor do i care to. how do i know? this is really stuff she should work out if not with him, at least with herself. but then, i hear al overreacts to everything, and that it always boils down to him thinking that she doesn't love him or something. as though they wouldn't be able to see one another if they weren't living together. i mean, i've tried to tell her rational ways of putting things so maybe he'll get it, but none of them have worked.
in related news, lauren's gone spare. except that al went back to pennsylvania for the weekend, which got a big hooray out of lauren after he was gone. but really, lauren's gone spare. and she doesn't wanna end it with him, because she wants this time to be different... to prove that she can do that not-breaking-up thing, which sounds like more of her hard-headedness to me than actually wanting to stay with him. but i hesitate to say anything, because i don't know the whole story (nor do i really want to, as with most explosions, ground zero, not a place to be).
okay. i'm getting outta here.
good night, everybody.
yes, i know they're dumb
but i took them anyway
first of all, they were quite sure i was a woman
and then i changed a couple answers
ones that i would have had to write long, complicated answers to
had it been that kind of test
and then they were quite sure that i'm a man
it also said i'm-
34% gay, which is below the standard for straight guys. odd, huh? especially since the were *so* sure i was a woman.
9% stressed, which i must argue with, because for some reason, i am somewhat stressed. this was also below average.
23% bastard, again, and as with everything else but purity, below average.
18% bitch, seems i'm a lot nicer than a lot of people.
67% pure, above average. of course.
okay, now that that stuff's out of the way, i'll say that i've come to terms with the bad stuff from maine, and now you can get in on a bit of it. essentially, this girl who came with us got the hots for me and wanted to shove her hands in my pants. and for some odd reason, i decide to be somewhat scientific, and just see what she'll do, all along, me knowing that a) i'd been putting up with a feeling of grossness about it (especially this time she kissed the back of my neck, which would be hot most other times, but really wasn't when i wasn't into it), and b) when that grossness reached a certain point (along with her hand, i suppose), i would put an end to the whole deal, being too grossed-out and anyway too unsleazy a guy to let it keep on (i can put these things on hold a little bit in the interest of curiosity, but wrong is wrong). so anyway, i try to get her hand on my leg, and my mom sees. ugh. fortunately, she didn't make issue of it. and you know, i *knew* i shoulda gone in my sister's car on the way back. i should really have paid attention to the foreshadowing of the whole deal. like when the girl kissed me (minutely, as with on the neck, and thankfully so, i wouldn't have been able to deal with anything bigger) the first night when we got all drunk (we got all drunk most of the nights, but i was far more watchful the other ones), and when my sister said she gets the hots for every guy she sees.
the ironic thing is, i usually yowl and whine that noone wants to do any of that stuff with me. of course, i'd like it to be the right someone, which she definitely wasn't.
but really, that's it. i know you're all probably very disappointed, and thought i'd lost fingers or something.
the good things, i must now mention-
i totally made a mountain my bitch. i climbed up one side of it, careened, hurtled, and sped uncontrolably down the other side, and finally had to ran, walk and pole vault my way back to the dock in time for the ferry off the stinkin island. i will explain the pole vaulting. most of us picked out walking sticks. i picked out a huge branch, with odd twists in it, and used it the entire time to jump a few feet, when walking or running was not to be opted for. midway 'round the base of the mountain on the way back, my sister and i (the only ones to make it all the way up and down the blasted thing) found a nice little beach and got nicely saturated with cool lakewater before picking up and hiking again.
and there was a meteor shower, which rocked. i saw bunches o' shootin stars.
and the rest, i'll say, involved food, cause i don't feel like trying to come up with anymore.
anyway, $100 more in the bank, that is, if my dad has already put it there.
it was originally $200, and supposed to be for maine, but i didn't spend any of it there.
so i wanted to put it all away, but my dad said to keep a hundred, for spending here
which i did, buying lauren a gameboy color (the one that came with pokemon crystal, like mine), and a powerpuff girls game, the one with buttercup, which is her favorite (i like bubbles better). this is all because i missed her birthday, and didn't get her anything for x-mas. and i wanted to stop her from whining about that, and had a hundred dollars. she paid for the other stuff that night, though. then we came back here, and had a huge pokemon playing festival of playing pokemon. then a little powerpuff girls, and she had to go home, cause she had work the next day. al is going to hate me. or at least think we're having an affair or something.
she's trying to either kick him out, or move out herself. she complains that he doesn't know how to do things, and then won't teach him to do them so she won't have to go nuts anymore. "it's not my responsibility to teach him this crap" or whatever she keeps saying. swallow it, damn you. just teach him. i don't really care if he doesn't need another mother figure, you're being one already, paying for the apartment, at least lessen your own frustration with him by solving the problems that are as easy to solve as teaching him how to iron his clothes. for christ's sake!
of course, lauren is too hard-headed to listen, even if i were to say that to her. she'd know i was right, but brush it off as stuff she didn't wanna do anyway, just because. and then she asks me if i think they actually have a chance, and of course, i don't form opinions on that sort of thing, nor do i care to. how do i know? this is really stuff she should work out if not with him, at least with herself. but then, i hear al overreacts to everything, and that it always boils down to him thinking that she doesn't love him or something. as though they wouldn't be able to see one another if they weren't living together. i mean, i've tried to tell her rational ways of putting things so maybe he'll get it, but none of them have worked.
in related news, lauren's gone spare. except that al went back to pennsylvania for the weekend, which got a big hooray out of lauren after he was gone. but really, lauren's gone spare. and she doesn't wanna end it with him, because she wants this time to be different... to prove that she can do that not-breaking-up thing, which sounds like more of her hard-headedness to me than actually wanting to stay with him. but i hesitate to say anything, because i don't know the whole story (nor do i really want to, as with most explosions, ground zero, not a place to be).
okay. i'm getting outta here.
good night, everybody.
posted by dan at
3:40:00 AM
